That'll do, sir. That'll do.
Our stock analysts have finally returned from their holiday vacations, allowing us to once again give you the advice you need to make the correct moves with your fan portfolio.
Strong Buy - Feel free to invest heavily with your fan dollars. This player will deliver every time.
Buy - Getting results, safe bet to invest your fandom in. Will disappoint rarely.
Hold - The results aren't there, but it isn't time to give up yet. Buying or selling equally acceptable.
Sell - Time to seriously consider your investment decision. Results consistently not there, and the trend is they will not be there.
Strong Sell - The lowest of rankings. Time to get out, and get out now, before your investment is totally worthless.
Note: The analysis will change from week to week, and are not equal from player to player. It's just our thing.
Dany Heatley (HETR) - With Koivu back, Heatley is back. So many calling for his head, they are overlooking the fact the goals he is scoring are massive. Game winners. Game tying goals. Would be nice to see an increase, but let's hope the big goals don't stop. Rating:Strong Buy
Devin Setoguchi (GUCH) - Still out. Would be really nice to have him back on the ice. Rating: Hold
Niklas Backstrom (BAX) - Can't wait for the haters to come back out. The team is losing. Has to be Backstrom's fault, right? Rating: Strong Buy
Marek Zidlicky (ZHID) - Had two of his best games of the season this past week. If that continues, he may pull himself out of the gutter. Rating: Hold.
Matt Cullen (TWI) - Cullen has hit a bit of a cold streak. Being asked to fill in fro Koivu is no easy task. He has to adjust back to his role. Give him time, he'll be worth the risk. Rating: Buy
Guillaume Latendresse (BTE) - His shot, his presence, and his scoring are all badly missed. Health is far more important, though. Rating: Hold
Pierre-Marc Bouchard (BALD) - This guy is on fire lately. He is shooting, he is creating chances, he is playing his tail off. Good to see him step up. Rating: Buy.
Nick Schultz (MO) - Five more Nick Schultz's would be fantastic. Rating: Strong Buy
Greg Zanon (BLK) - Clearly on the trading block, being scratched regularly. Not sure what he did wrong, but it is time to either play him or move him. He deserves that much. Rating: Hold
Kyle Brodziak (GLUE) - Still playing out of his mind, but the results aren't showing up as much. Still one of the best checkers in the league. Results are what is needed, and with the team losing, the ratings simply cannot maintain the height they had. Rating: Buy
Cal Clutterbuck (HIT) - Only complaint? Shoot more. Other than that, just keep doing what you're doing. Rating: Buy.
Darroll Powe (POW) - Not sure how he ends up a second line forward, but he has skated there a few times lately. The PK has become passive, something that is not a welcome sight. Is it coaching, or panic? That information we don't have, but Powe looks tentative. Bring back the aggression. Rating: Hold
Josh Harding (BKUP) - Is Harding even still around? Tough to gauge a guy when he never plays. Very strange how he has all but disappeared lately. Rating: Hold
Mike Lundin (WHO) - He is the odd man out more than not. In the games he has made, he has made some pretty glaring mistakes. Need Lundin to at least push the young guys, and he isn't really doing that. Rating: Sell
Marco Scandella (PZZA) - He took his first healthy scratch of the year against Phoenix. Get the message, kid? His game slipped a bit, and the Wild need him at the top level. Rating: Hold
Colton Gillies (MBDY) - Last update, the shine had worn off. Now, the tarnish is setting in. Gillies simply is a shell of his former self. Would be nice to see him work through it, but he may need a ladder at this point. Rating: Hold
Clayton Stoner (STDY) - Hurt and off the ice. Rating: Hold
Jared Spurgeon (TINY) - Has been, without a doubt, the most consistent d-man on the team. Leading the blue line in points, playing well defensively. If not for his inability to know that a hand on your back means you are about to crushed into the wall from behind, he is the best the Wild have. Rating: Strong Buy
Justin Falk (FLKR) - Has been good to see him be physical and use his size. Our analysts still think there is an offensive aspect to his game he is not showing. Rating: Hold.
Nick Johnson (BWCE) - One of the best forecheckers on the team, and one of only a handful that continue to play the system no matter what. Mike Yeo should hold this guy up as the example. Rating: Strong Buy
Casey Wellman (CLGE) Hurt. Sigh. Rating: Hold
Matt Kassian (SHIN) - Significant beat downs of Darcy Hordichuk are sure to earn you points. Should see some fourth line minutes, and if he can prove he can keep up, he may get to stick around. Rating: Hold
Nate Prosser (STIF) - This kid needs to stay. Hands down. He won't, but he really should. Rating: Buy
Jarod Palmer (HOPE) - Played very well until... wait for it... he was hurt. No word on the severity, or even the specific injury. When listing an "upper body" injury, and unwilling to give details, it reeks of concussion. But that is pure speculation. Rating: Hold
Warren Peters (FIX) - No insult intended, but if Peters could go back to Houston, the Wild would be an improved team. He is solid in pivoting the fourth line, but his presence is due to a massive number of injuries. Never a good sign. Rating: Hold
Brad Staubitz (BTZY) - Our analysts are torn. Does he offer anything to the team that Kassian can't? Is he really the answer anymore? The consensus seems to be no. Rating: Sell
Wild Power Play (SUCC) - Passive, ugly, not scoring. Unacceptable. It is time for the umbrella to be put away. Rating: Strong Sell
NHL Refereeing (REF) - The refs are clearing taking their lead from their bosses. Inconsistency in both directions, call one thing, but not the same call the next time. It really is quite sad. Rating: Strong Sell
Department of Player Safety (JOKE) - If you are invested in this stock at all, you're just asking to lose. There should be a new ranking for just how bad of an investment this is. Rating: Strong Sell
Jed Ortmeyer (ORTS) - Ortmeyer has been up and down with the injuries pulling players in and out of the lineup. Much like Peters, there is no reason to insult the guy. He is a bit out of place, but nothing major. A healthy Wild team makes Ortmeyer a valuable resource in Houston. An injured Wild team makes him a quick fix in St. Paul. Rating: Hold
Jon DiSalvatore (AERO) - DiSalvatore got his reward for being the heart and soul of the Aeros with a one game call up to the big squad. He got some second line time, didn't look overly out of place, but did not show up on the score sheet. WOuld like to see him in a more grinder role if he is going to be in St. Paul. Rating: Hold
Matthew Hackett (HACK) - Returned to Houston. A bright future for this kid. Rating: Strong Buy
Jeff Taffe (GOPH) - Great few games for Taffe. He'll be back. Rating: Buy
Paul Deutsch (FREE) - You gotta love the story. A 51 year old small business owner gets inked for a one day deal to serve as an emergency backup until Matt Hackett can get to St. Paul. He didn't make it into a game, but the story alone is worth a million bucks, easy. #FreeDeutsch Rating: Strong Buy
Kris Fredheim (PUPY) - Sent back to Houston, but certainly proved himself a capable replacement should the Wild need him. Rating: Hold
Brett Bulmer (JR) - Sent back to play against children, we're not sure what Chuck Fletcher was thinking here, but it is what it is. We're keeping the kid as a strong buy. Can't wait to see him back. Rating: Strong Buy
Cody Almond (JOY) - Unimpressive in his stint with the Wild. Hate to say it, but it may almost be time for him to move on. Rating: Hold